{"id":2285,"date":"2024-11-14T11:30:37","date_gmt":"2024-11-14T16:30:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/?p=2285"},"modified":"2024-11-15T18:01:33","modified_gmt":"2024-11-15T23:01:33","slug":"the-meaning-of-must","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/the-meaning-of-must\/","title":{"rendered":"The Meaning of Must"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wpb-content-wrapper\"><p>[vc_row full_width=&#8221;stretch_row_content&#8221; custom_padding=&#8221;true&#8221; custom_padding_t=&#8221;30&#8243; custom_padding_b=&#8221;30&#8243; row_hide_sm=&#8221;yes&#8221; row_hide_md=&#8221;yes&#8221; row_hide_xs=&#8221;yes&#8221; css_zindex=&#8221;999&#8243; css=&#8221;.vc_custom_1706567709549{background-color: #faf5eb !important;}&#8221;][vc_column]<div class=\"templatera_shortcode\"><div class=\"container-fluid row_section vc_row_cp_lr_15 vc_row_cp_t_0 vc_row_cp_b_0\"><div  class=\"vc_row wpb_row vc_row-fluid vc_column-gap-15 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Mason<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><div class=\"vc_empty_space  vc_empty_space_3\"   style=\"height: 10px\" ><span class=\"vc_empty_space_inner\"><\/span><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953ac3f8518c539034164\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/blog\/\">Articles<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><div class=\"vc_empty_space  vc_empty_space_4\"   style=\"height: 10px\" ><span class=\"vc_empty_space_inner\"><\/span><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"vc_custom_heading vc_custom_heading_6953ac3f852b5295605760\" ><h5 style=\"font-size: 17px;color: #000000;text-align: left\"><span class=\"hilight\"  ><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amblesideschools.com\/main\/educator-support\" target=\"_blank\">Members<\/a><\/span><\/h5><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>[\/vc_column_inner][\/vc_row_inner][\/vc_column][vc_column width=&#8221;3\/4&#8243;][vc_column_text]<\/p>\n<h4><a href=\"https:\/\/amblesideschools.org\/blog\/\"><span style=\"color: #003865;\">&gt; Return to Articles<\/span><\/a><\/h4>\n<p>[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_custom_heading text=&#8221;The Meaning of Must&#8221; use_theme_fonts=&#8221;yes&#8221; font_container=&#8221;tag:h1|font_size:30|text_align:left|color:%23020202&#8243;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;30&#8243;][vc_column_text]There is a human tendency to think of life as a grand abstraction rather than as a set of relationships to be nurtured in definite hours. In her book, <em>168 Hours,<\/em> Laura Vanderkam suggests:<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>If you want to be a writer, you must dedicate hours to putting words on a page\u2026<\/p>\n<p>To be a mindful parent, you must spend time with your child\u2026.<\/p>\n<p>If you want to sing well in a functioning chorus, you must show up for rehearsals\u2026<\/p>\n<p>If you want to be healthy, you must exercise\u2026<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Reading this text, I was struck by the use of the word <em>must<\/em> as a necessary corollary to the <em>wants<\/em> listed above. I am reminded of Charlotte Mason\u2019s words to parents:<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\u201cBut the first duty of the parent is to teach children the meaning of must; and the reason why some persons in authority fail to obtain prompt and cheerful obedience from their children is that they do not recognize must in their own lives.\u201d <sup>1<\/sup><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>This recognition of must is another human principle at work. Must in living means, I live under authority, I live in relationship, and I live responsibly.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Most adults feel the constraining must in the daily workplace. But what about the musts in our leisure time, in our relationships, in the nagging list of \u201cto dos\u201d we carry with us from week to week, year to year?\u00a0 Some might feel put off by the question because they feel entitled to their free time after being responsible all day at work.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>What adult plans on being unhealthy?\u00a0 Negatively bonding with a friend? Watching television multiple hours a week?\u00a0 Hurling commands at their children?\u00a0 If you want to be healthy, you <em>must <\/em>eat well and exercise. If you want to have friendships that make deposits into your life, you <em>must <\/em>choose friends that work through the stresses of life in maturity. If you want to have an intellectual life and engage in activities that nourish you, you<em> must<\/em> not watch television for endless hours.<strong> If you want meaningful time with the children, you <em>must<\/em> engage in conversation and share life together.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>To have personal integrity, must, <em>must<\/em> have meaning.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Maryellen St. Cyr<\/p>\n<p>Found, Director of Curriculum<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><sup>1<\/sup> Essex Cholmondley, <em>The Story of Charlotte Mason<\/em>, 226.[\/vc_column_text][vc_empty_space height=&#8221;15&#8243;][vc_separator width_in_percentages=&#8221;yes&#8221;][vc_raw_html]JTVCeWFycHAlNUQ=[\/vc_raw_html][\/vc_column][\/vc_row]<\/p>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The recognition of must is another human principle at work. Must in living means, I live under authority, I live in relationship, and I live responsibly.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":2287,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,12],"tags":[70],"class_list":["post-2285","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-maryellen-st-cyr","category-philosophy","tag-parenting"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>The Meaning of Must - Ambleside International<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It was a beautiful week. 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